Just over 7 years ago, I went on a girl-trip to a bridal shower in South Carolina. During this trip, I was inspired to develop a coffee table book that I planned to entitle “Bathrooms of the South.” Starting with our first break, somewhere in Kentucky, we stumbled upon perhaps the worst bathroom ever (and I’ve seen some really terrible ones!).
To get to this bathroom, we had to walk into the convenience store (part of a gas station chain that seemed reliable), exit a side door to a walkway that curved around to the back of the building, and finally enter another hallway to the women’s room. It had a private sink, tucked in a private corner. The stall, however, had a door with an eight-inch gap that gave a perfect view of the hallway (since the main door to this area did not close). So we took turns using the facility with one of us holding up a large sweater in front of the gap.
In North Carolina, on that same trip, we used a bathroom that had the toilet paper plopped onto the door knob of the bathroom. There was no “holder” other than that doorknob and it was within reach. It was difficult to wash up afterward, however, as where the sink should have been was merely a large hole in the wall.
Naturally, I took pictures of all of these rooms and planned my coffee table book, but I didn’t think five pictures were enough.
So I kept looking for good bathroom shots to include. Returning to South Carolina later that year, I found one more. It was actually in our hotel – a brand new hotel with sparkling clean rooms and wonderful amenities.
As I was drying my hair the next morning, I thought my husband had gotten into the shower. I turned around to look, but the shower was empty. There was a waterfall, however. It was coming from the ceiling and pouring into our tub – from the room above!
Over the years, I’ve continued to collect photos to memorialize interesting, dysfunctional, and funny bathrooms all over the Southeast (and some in the Midwest, as well).
My latest bathroom adventure took place just before Christmas, again in South Carolina. We were visiting friends and went to a wonderful restaurant for delicious homemade soups and sandwiches. The bathroom was tucked at the back of the dining room, sort of adjacent to the back of the kitchen.
After eating, I stood up to use the restroom. My girlfriend said, “Read all the signs,” as I walked by. Entering the bathroom, I turned and locked the door and saw no sign on the door. I turned and looked at the sink and commode, and saw a cute sign that said something about washing hands. I sat down to do my business and that’s when I noticed a small (very small) typed sign on a second door in the bathroom. It was about six feet away and said “be sure to lock and unlock the door to the kitchen.”
It was a little late, and of course, someone started to open that door. I screeched out “Ack, I’m in here!” and the door to the kitchen closed quickly.
I also finished quickly, washed up, and left the bathroom in a rush. Okay, totally my fault, but it did seem to me that that information should have been posted in LARGE PRINT and perhaps in more than one place.
It occurred to me later that my friend’s advice could have been more helpful. How about “lock both doors”??!!
My husband and I use to travel quite a bit and have had some experiences with restrooms. It seems women have the need for more frequent pit stops than men. (For some reason, my husband seemed to think I could hold it longer than he could.) I always pleaded with him, no gas stations, please. I want a restaurant with a clean restroom. But when I had to go, I had to go, and would take anything available! Once in a southern state, I had a desperate urge to go and would have taken anything – even an outhouse! The first thing we could find was a gas station with the john on the side of the building. It sounded somewhat like the one you used on your trip to South Carolina. However, I sure was thankful to find it. We left the place and was about five miles down the road when I realized I had left my wedding rings laying on the sink at the gas station. I always removed my rings when I washed my hands. I just knew they would be gone when we got back. We broke the speed limit returning there, but thankfully, no one had taken the rings. I’m sure people avoided going there unless it was an emergency.
Speaking of my wedding rings, on one of our vacations we had gotten a motel on Daytona Beach in Florida. As soon as we arrived, we put our luggage on the bed, changed into bathing suits and were headed out the door for a walk on the beach. I decided to leave my rings in the (nice, clean) bathroom. I put them in an ashtray and covered them with my husband’s Fruit of the Looms. Who in the world would pick up those Looms to look for anything if they entered the room! We took our beach towels and found a place we liked on the beach. I put the motel key in my bathing suit robe pocket and left it on a towel before going for a walk. After we returned and sunbathed awhile, I reached into my pocket for the motel key. It wasn’t there! I told my husband that the key was missing. He took off running back to the motel. When I got there, I saw our clothes strewn all over the bed and drawers opened. I went to the bathroom, picked up the underwear, and the rings were still in the ashtray — safe and sparkling! But that’s about rings, not restrooms.
I do believe some of the county fairs have the worst restrooms ever! At least three different counties built stalls where the door turns inward! Who engineered these! After doing your business and trying to stand up, your face nearly touches the inside of the door. Now you have to try to get around beside the toilet bowl, nearly back to the tank, to open the door and exit. And there’s plenty of room for the doors to be opened outward! In one restroom the mirror was so high I could only see the top of my head! Who put the mirror up? Marshall Dillon!!! But that’s a mirror story, not restrooms.
I have frequented restrooms where both male and female use the same one. I firmly believe “women only” are better because they are much cleaner. If the place doesn’t have urinals – well, you know… the target gets missed. Some restrooms are so bad I would actually prefer using a port-a-john. Did you know that Sir John Harrington, godson of Queen Elizabeth I, invented Britain’s first flushing toilet? Hence, the naming of our current flushing toilets as “John”.
I’m assuming my husband and I should stay married because when we had a home robbery, my wedding rings were in plain sight, hanging on a ring holder and not stolen. Three times I could have lost them, but didn’t. But then again, we’re talking about restrooms, not rings! I have a recurring dream that I am in a restroom and for some reason I cannot use it. Every stall is either in use, broken, or so dirty I cannot use any of them. The last dream of johns was every stall was under maintenance. There were all kinds of tools in each one. I think these dreams happen when it’s time for me to get up and visit our own bathroom.
It’s a good thing I put this “Reply” in “Drafts” yesterday because I had another dream last night about toilets. My husband says he never dreams and that I dream in detail. Anyhow these three toilets were on the side of a mountain. A lady came out of the first one and a little girl jumped ahead of me and went in. The second one had no door, just walls around it and another lady was using that one. I had one choice left — the third one. It was totally out in the open; no walls, nothing but a seat! This toilet seat is made of cement and it’s crumbling. I would have to sit on tiny pieces of broken cement. Suddenly I have a grey chamois cloth with a green square in the center of it in my hand. I am swatting it across the seat trying to knock off these obstructions. And… I wake up. Yes, I need to make a trip to the bathroom. I just wonder what will happen in these dreams if I actually get to use one of these toilets!
I don’t know, Susie. Maybe next time you can write about mirrors, dreams and wedding rings. I can only come up with these things because you start me out on something. Thanks again!
Bets