Anyone who knows me, knows that I do not take a lot of medication. I’ve been blessed to not have many illnesses or chronic health conditions in my life which is a significant factor, but the other big factor is that I can’t take pills. I mean, obviously I can, but it’s not easy and certainly not a pretty sight. For some reason, my throat closes up, I lose my breath, I gag…it’s pretty awful. Of course, as one ages, certain things do require attention.
Over the years, I’ve added a fiber chewy to my daily regime. This is such a blessing because they are little gummies and I can pretend they are candy!
So gummy fiber chews were an easy addition. Then came the Vitamin D deficiency my doctor noted. I was fearful at first, but those pills are ridiculously tiny. So tiny, in fact, that it’s impossible to shake just one out of the bottle. I usually get a handful and it takes many minutes to get them all back into the bottle, with just one left outside. Not only are they small, they’re slippery and they roll around on the counter and onto the floor – where they may be found at some future unspecified point. But, easy to swallow, once you’ve finally gotten just one out of the bottle.
Then came the magnesium. These are for my muscle issues and work very well. They are small tablets, but not coated. Five out of six days, I can swallow them without incident. But on that 6th day, the edge hits the side or back of my throat and I gag a little. Unpleasant, but doable.
I was doing fine until I found out that I needed to add glucosamine-chondroitin to my diet every day. I cheerfully went out and bought a bottle, because anything that helps reduce my joint pain is a-ok by me. Until I opened the bottle and discovered these “pills” are the size of my big toe!
My husband, my soul mate, and my chief supporter said things that really didn’t help, as he threw back his head and consumed three similarly sized vitamin pills himself. First there was, “oh you can do it,” then he said, “just relax,” and added (my personal favorite), “it’s all in your head.”
Maybe so, but there is no way I’m going to get that down without major trauma and possibly death. So, I did the smart thing and cut it in half. While I was doing this, my husband got very serious and said, “Honey, I think it’s psychosomatic. Your throat is easily big enough for that pill.”
Pah. Shows what he knows! It’s clearly esophageal-somatic. I’m telling you, I can choke and gag on a milkshake or thick soup. I’ve been known to have my throat close up just by drinking water! So I know this particular issue is all in my throat, and not my head.
Now there are two halves of the immense pill on my napkin, just staring back at me. Honestly, they are still bigger than the magnesium tablet. I began to wonder if I should cut it in thirds, but too late. I bravely grabbed the first half, relaxed as much as I could, and tossed it back. It went down okay. I tried the second one, and of course, it stuck a little in the back of my throat, one rough edge scraping the side. But after several sips of water, it did go down.
Tomorrow? I’ll try cutting it in thirds. And all I can say is, my knees better improve – a lot!