Thank you, Mr. Engvall!

One of my favorite comedians, Bill Engvall, became famous for his tagline “there’s your sign.” He would use it after something was said that was really obvious to imply that the person making the statement was…well, shall we say, a little dense, and there was a snappy comeback. Here’s one of his examples.
Bill was driving on the interstate when he hit a stoppage. He got out of his truck and walked forward and saw a semi, wedged under an overpass. He was talking with the driver when the state trooper showed up and started walking toward them. Bill said to himself, “Don’t say it, don’t say it,” but sure enough the Trooper said, “Get your truck stuck?” and without missing a beat, the driver answered, “Nope! I was delivering that bridge and ran out of gas!” There’s your sign, Bill would say.
I found a lot of similar stories on the internet. One person related that when friends or acquaintances came to her home, they would notice the litter box and say, “Oh, have you got a cat?” She would quickly respond, “oh, no, that’s for company.”
I’m not sure if that won her more friends or not, but it was funny. There’s your sign.
Another gentleman indicated that he was looking for work and noticed that every job application had a blank for who to be called in case of an emergency. He said he wrote, every time, “an ambulance.”
There’s your sign.
Now, up until recently, I had not had any direct experience with being asked an obvious question (well, okay, sometimes folks will see me coming in dripping wet and ask, “raining?” – but I’ve never had a witty comeback for that). But that all changed a week or so ago.
I was in a shoe store. This store sells only shoes, nothing else. You could count the small rack of socks near the registers, but really, it’s only shoes. A young woman with three tattoos and green hair walked up to me as I entered and asked, “What brings you in today?” I looked at her for a moment and before I had time to think, I blurted out, “I’m interested in buying a refrigerator.”
She didn’t quite know how to respond, had that deer in the headlights look, and I couldn’t help laughing.
There’s your sign. Now let me say for the record that I don’t think her tattoos and/or green hair had anything to contribute. It was just a vivid picture.
By the way, and apropos of nothing, the easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement. I have discovered this truth about seven times in the last year. There’s my sign!