Conspiracies

I’ve never been a big proponent of conspiracy theories.  They seem a little far-fetched to me, and I’ll get to that later.  But one really hit home this week when my massage therapist (while pressing hard on muscles that were very tight) told me that she had heard that there was going to be a “switch flipped” this month and everyone who was vaccinated was going to become a savage cannibal.  Or perhaps a zombie.  Either way, something bad.

               As a fully vaccinated person (and I mean, everything –measles, mumps, polio, tuberculosis, rubella, smallpox, Covid, and today, flu!)- I’m a little concerned to hear that my carnivorous behavior could turn ugly. Beyond that, exactly what “switch” are “they” flipping, and who is “they”?  These questions brought out a new set of conspiratorial conflicts.  They were so convoluted; that I actually could not follow them all. 

               In fact, they were so bizarre I just discounted them completely.  Never fear, these theories are in good company. Now, I know that conspiracies do happen.  Watergate is a great example.  People really did collude to break in and then cover up crimes.  Certainly, Osama bid Laden and a crew of mostly Saudi hijackers conspired to attack America on September 11, 2001.

But honestly, many of the conspiracy theories out there today that are flourishing are simply from people putting some wild idea on social media and having enough followers to make it “real.” That said, they simply aren’t credible.    Me turning into a zombie turns out to be something someone posted on the internet that gained traction.  It also had a few mistakes and outright lies in it, but hey that’s never been a deterrent to getting people to get upset.    

There are a few other “conspiracies” I’ve decided to disbelieve. There’s a whole group out there – with some published books and television documentaries – that say man never landed on the moon.  These same wise ones also put forth that the world is actually flat.  No reason to believe the science on either of these, I guess, at least in some folk’s minds.  What an insult to, not only scientists, astronomers, and astrophysicists, but to astronauts – true American heroes!

When airplanes travel, they leave behind them long water condensation trails.  These cloud-like tracks dissipate.  Conspiracy folks have long said these trails include dangerous chemicals being dumped on us.  Despite a 2016 study published in Environmental Research which proved there were no chemicals in these pretty trails, people continue to believe it’s not so.  Mistrusting science again (I’m getting a pattern here).

The worst one I’ve heard is the radio announcer who claimed the shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary School was a hoax.  After losing in the lawsuit that bereaved families brought against him, he admitted that the mass shooting had occurred.  Sadly, only after thousands of his “fans” believed him and spread the misinformation around social media for months. 

A lot of the conspiracy theories center on fear of government control and mistrust of science.  But the people who spread these theories watch television (science), delve into social media (science), go to doctors (science, and government if over 65), and use automobiles (science).  So it puzzles me why some science is used and adored, and some is questioned.

Maybe I’ll figure it out when I turn into a zombie.